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Volume 1, Issue 11
Volume 1, Issue 11
June 1, 2007
By Susan L. Reid MS, DMA
Small Business Start Up Coach, Consultant
& Online Accidental Prenher™
An online newsletter about how to start up and successfully launch small businesses for entrepreneurial women who are ready to transform their lives and make a difference in the world, turn their passion into a profit, and bring in a six figure income.
In This Issue
Today's Topic: Resistance
- Business Quote from Abraham-Hicks
- Resistance or Fear: What’s the Difference?
- Accidental Pren-her™ Blog Highlights
- Q & A: What does it mean to over-deliver to our clients and customers?
This e-Zine is intended to be read in 10 minutes or less, with many of the articles offering links to further information. To ensure we continue to capture the most important issues regarding the successful start up and launch of small businesses, we are keen for our readers to interact with us and let us know what’s on their minds. Speak up and be heard at: Susan@LaunchYou.com
To subscribe to this e-Zine click here.
To read our blog go to: http://susanreid.typepad.com
Note From Susan
Greetings, Fellow Entrepreneurs
Inspired by all my clients, friends, and e-Zine readers who have asked me questions about resistance, I had such a great time writing this article. And, as is always the case, I learned a lot myself – this time about the difference between resistance and fear.
One of the things I learned is that there are many degrees of resistance. On a scale from one to ten, resistance ranges from mild unease to strong anger. In between are feelings of being stuck, blocked, anxious, frustrated, and confused. Guilt, scarcity, procrastination, and self-doubt are also contained within the vibration of resistance. No matter what form resistance takes, the result is the same. You’re all revved up and ready to go, jazzed about implementing a great idea you’ve been thinking about, only to find yourself dragging your heels for some unknown reason.
In this issue, Abraham-Hicks starts us off with a great quote on negative and positive energy.
Next up is the main article, Resistance or Fear: What’s the Difference? This article is a must-read for anyone who has chucked (or is considering chucking) a great idea or passionate pursuit. Wait! Don’t throw the baby out with the bath water, saying, “I guess this just wasn’t meant to be.” Hold the phone. Read this article. You owe it to yourself to find out what’s really going on. You’ll be glad you did!
Round out your reading by checking out some of this week’s blog highlights. The post on Motivation and Insight really has some great comments--thank you, Marlene, Debbe, and Pam. So does Holding Hands with Your Inner Samurai--thanks Dana, Yvonne, and Carol.
My personal favorite blog highlight is, The Mind Works in Possibilities, the Intuition Works in Actualities. This piece was inspired by a quote from D.H. Lawrence. What I discovered while doing the research for it will blow you away! Your comments mean so much. Weigh in and add your voice.
Business Quote Of The Week
Negative emotion is your indicator of resistance, while positive emotion is your indicator of allowance. And they are on the same meter: allowance; resistance. Allowance; resistance.
For more business start up quotes go to: http://www.alkamae.com/articles.php?cat=50
Resistance or Fear: What's the Difference?
Fear is not resistance. Did you know that? Most of us don’t. We confuse fear with resistance, using the two words interchangeably. We’ve bought into the notion that if we are feeling resistant toward something, that that’s an indicator that we shouldn’t do it. So we don’t. That’s a problem.
How many times has this happened to you? You’re all revved up and ready to go, jazzed about implementing a great idea you’ve been thinking about, only to find yourself dragging your heels for some unknown reason.
What happened? Once you were bright-eyed with excitement. Now, you’re doubled over with doubt, feeling confused, stuck, and irritable. “Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea,” you begin. “I guess this just wasn’t meant to be,” you conclude.
Hold the phone! More to the point, hold the baby and don’t throw her out with the bath water! Before you chuck that great idea, read this article. Find out what’s really going on.
Is It Fear or Is It Resistance?
Fear is a vibration of powerlessness.
Resistance is a vibration of possibilities.
Resistance is the number one thing that will stop you in your tracks. Fear will jettison you into fight or flight mode. Resistance tries to figure things out, ruminates on the problem, and seeks answers to that dead-end question: “Why?” Fear doesn’t think. Fear acts.
Energetically, powerlessness feels quite different from opposition. Doesn’t it? Test it out. Think this thought: fear. How did your body respond to the thought of fear? Did you notice your eyes dilating? Did you experience rapid and shallow breathing? Did your eyes narrow and dart around the room looking for an escape route or assault weapon? Could you feel your body winding-up, getting ready to spring?
Now, think this thought: opposition. How did your body respond to that thought? Did you feel your arms crossing protectively in front of your chest? Did you notice your feet spreading apart, taking a wider stance? Could you feel your breath deepening in preparation for a standoff? Think Wyatt Earp at the O.K. Corral.
The Voices of Powerlessness and Opposition
Run! Go! Command is the voice of powerlessness. Fear expresses itself in short, one-word phrases. That’s because the part of the brain that functions when you are in fear is the reptilian brain, the brain stem. The reptilian brain acts on stimulus and response. It makes quick decisions without thinking. The reptilian brain is driven by fear, focuses on survival, and takes over when you feel threatened or endangered.
What is holding me back? What am I afraid of? Questioning is the voice of resistance. So are statements such as, “over my dead body” and the Dirty Harry mantra, “Go ahead; make my day.” Resistance expresses itself in complete sentences. That’s because the neocortex governs your ability to speak, think, and solve problems. It is the most evolutionary, advanced part of your brain and affects your creativity and ability to learn.
Fear, the Great Mobilizer
Governed by the reptilian brain, fear bypasses the neocortex and mobilizes the body into action. Whether real or imagined, fear is a powerful biological reaction that kicks in when you physically feel threatened. Fear prepares you for fight or flight. To attack or run. Fear is a strategic weapon that only operates in survival mode. If you are in survival mode, you won’t need to ask yourself the question, “What am I afraid of?” You will know.
On a power-to-powerless scale of one to ten, with one being most powerful, fear is a ten. Feeling afraid is a seven or eight. Feeling terrified is an eight or nine. When you are feeling afraid or terrified, you still can think. You are still operating out of your neocortex. Once you hit ten, though, you’re cooked. You’ve dropped down into your brain stem and are galvanized to action.
Resistance, the Great Immobilizer
Resistance is your neocortex alarm bell alerting you to opposition. On the scale of no resistance-to-great resistance, slight uneasiness is a one. Four or five is confusion. Upward from that are agitation, frustration, inertia, and anger. Worry, guilt, and self-doubt weigh in at the three or four mark. Discouragement and scarcity range between three and nine, depending on the intensity of the feeling.
The higher you go up the scale of resistance, the more opposition you feel. The more opposition you feel, the more immobilized you become. Your degree of immobilization is directly proportional to how important something is to you. Pushing through or ignoring your resistance makes things worse. To make things better, discover the answer to the question, “What do I need to allow?”
Five Steps to Turning Resistance Around
Hope floats on Isaac Newton’s Third Law of Motion: “For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.” Vibrationally, allowance is the opposite reaction to resistance.
Allowance is the key to figuring out what’s really going on with you. What’s behind your resistance? Figure out that piece of the puzzle, and you will know what’s been slowing you down, holding you back, and making you want to throw in the towel. Turn it around, and you will be well on your way to turning your great idea into reality.
How do you do that? By turning resistance on its ear. Ask the question, “What am I resisting?” Rather than answering it, turn it around. Ask:
- What do I need to allow?
- What is being called forth from within me to allow?
- What do I need to allow in, so I can feel full and inspired to move forward with my great idea?
Step One: Ask yourself whether you are experiencing fear or resistance. (Hint: If you can answer this question, then you are experiencing resistance. If you can’t, take cover!)
Step Two: Find the one word that best describes what you are experiencing. Identify what you are feeling, not what action you think you should take. “I need to let go” is an action phrase. These are feeling words:
Step Three: Keep Newton’s Third Law in mind by remembering that the solution is contained in the problem. For every action (resistance) there is an equal and opposite reaction (allowance). Find the complementary opposite to what you are feeling, and you will have found the key to turning your great idea into reality. Ask, “What is the antonym--the complementary opposite word--for what I am experiencing?”
- Anxiety = Ease
- Blockage = Openness
- Confusion = Clarity
Step Four: Determine what allowance is being called forth. Ask yourself:
- What do I need to feel ease around? Maybe you need to feel more comfortable with the process. Maybe you need to allow things more time.
- What do I need to be open about? It could be that you are being called forth to be open to new considerations. Maybe you need to allow things to unfold naturally without pushing for a specific outcome.
- What do I need to clarify? Perhaps you need more information or details to move forward. Maybe you need time to allow your vision to become clear.
Step Five: Take immediate action in the direction of your allowance--along your path of least resistance. Ask:
- What action of allowance would easily and effortlessly move me toward the manifestation of my great idea?
- What is the first step I could take along the path of least resistance that would align me with what I want?
Follow these steps and you can say good-bye to your murky decision-making process, and ”Hello, Baby” to your new manifestation process. Soon you will find yourself manifesting one great idea after another. So, before you throw that great idea of yours out with the bath water, turn it around. Focus on the allowance that is being called forth. Oh, what a difference!
Accidental Pren-her™ Blog Highlights
You can find our new blog, at: http://susanreid.typepad.com
In the Accidental Pren-her™ blog, I write about the process of turning entrepreneurial women into successful small business owners. It’s a great place to come and build community while embracing your inner Samurai.
Each week, I will post four different segments with the entrepreneurial woman in mind. They are:
- Monday--interviews and stories about Accidental Pren-hers
- Tuesday--alchemic wisdom from the inner Samurai
- Wednesday--reflections on the pren-her life
- Thursday--a book review from the inner Samurai bookshelf and pren-her reading room
Here are the articles I've added to the blog in the last couple of weeks. Just click on the link to read.
Show Me the Money - Top 7 stashes for start-up cash for small business owners.
Holding Hands with Your Inner Samurai - Isn't this the way love's supposed to be? Very cute otter video.
The Four Stages of the Buying Cycle - I don't much like being sold to, do you? Though, I do like to buy? Know these four stages and you will never need to sell again.
The Mind Works in Possibilities, the Intuition Works in Actualities - Here's some good news: Intuition is real. Not just some back-room mumbo-jumbo. Real. Read what a famous D.H. Lawrence quote and Hengel's Science and Logic have in common.
Motivation or Inspiration: What's the Difference? - This post generated a number of really interesting comments. Check it out and weigh in, yourself!
Duct Tape Marketing - Jam packed with practical help, inexpensive solutions, and years of marketing experience, this book is a great small business marketing guide.
If you'd like to receive email notification whenever I add a post to my blog, enter your email into the upper left hand corner of the blog. After you click on the confirmation email from Feedblitz, you'll be all set!
You can find our new blog, at: http://susanreid.typepad.com
Weigh in. Make a comment. Let us know what you think!
Ask The Accidental Prenher™
Q: One of our readers wrote, asking: What does it mean to over-deliver to our clients and customers?
A: Over-delivery essentially means surprising your clients by exceeding their expectations. Over-delivering is one of those things that, when done sincerely and with gladness in your heart, pays off powerfully. You get a lot of bang for the buck when you deliver more than expected, and it’s well worth the effort. When over-delivering, focus on being helpful, thoughtful and timely. If you can imagine your customers being delightfully surprised and grateful that you went “above and beyond”, then do it! Here are some examples:
- Purposely "beat" a promised deadline. Get something to them ahead of time.
- Periodically send them helpful information and notes about things you think will benefit them.
- Send an informal note with a “no strings attached” offer or service that you think they would like.
- Send an unexpected card of appreciation.
- If you’ve just read a book that you think would be helpful to them and their business, send it.
- Pass on relevant information you receive at conferences you attend.
- Remember their birthday, anniversary, and other special days.
- Be generous in introducing and connecting them with people you know who would be helpful to their business.
- Give them a break if they are late in getting something to you, and do all you can to get what they need to them on time.
- Summarize the content of an article you think they would like. Then send them the link if they want to read it in full.
Above all else, make sure that your energy and attitude exemplify “give to give”, rather than “give to get.
Disclaimer: I am neither an attorney nor an accountant and am not qualified to give you financial or legal advice. If you are starting up a business, it is important for you to contact qualified law and tax experts and seek their advice.
Do you have a burning “how to” question about starting up or launching your small business? Email me at Susan@LaunchYou.com, and I’ll answer it either in upcoming LAUNCH YOU! e-Zines or in my new Alkamae blog at: http://susanreid.typepad.com
That’s all for this issue, folks.
Until next time, happy launching!
Susan L. Reid, MS, DMA
Small Business Start Up Coach, Consultant & Online Accidental Prenher™
At Alkamae we specialize in launching successful small businesses one woman at a time.
p.s. Below are the “Hot Links” to our most frequented and requested sites:
Small Business Start Up Coaching for those who are ready to partner with a small business coach and position your new business for success: http://www.alkamae.com/product.php?id=9
Link to our Ready to Launch Power Pack Combo that includes our free e-book Are You Ready to Jump the Corporate Ship? Here’s How to Know! This free e-book and accompanying audio will lead you, step-by-step, through the process of deciding whether you are ready to jump the corporate ship and embark on the magnificent journey that will lead you to set-sail on your very own entrepreneurial ship.
Recommended reading for successful small business start ups: http://www.alkamae.com/resource-links.php?id=16
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